"Contentment and satisfaction come from being rooted and grounded in Him and His love for me." -Lindsay Behr

Conquer2016_DissatisfiedBlog

“Mommy, when will I be old enough to make my hair a different color?” my eight year old mind reeled as my mom and I drove around in our minivan.

“Why would you want to make your hair a different color, honey? You’re so beautiful just the way God made you.” It was a typical mom response.

“Well, because none of my friends have red hair. I’m the only one. Not a lot of people have red hair.” I had to reiterate so she would get it.

“Lindsay, did you know that some people spend a lot of money trying to make their hair red like yours? They want it to be red because it is so special, and they are tired of having hair like everybody else.”

Fast forward into my teen years and it sounded a little more like this, “God, I wish I could sing like my friends. I mean, I know I can carry a tune and all, but I’m not moving anybody to tears like they are. I just wish I was a little better.”

It wasn’t until I was almost into my twenties that I heard somebody speak about the gifts that God has given us. “God has given you the exact amount of talent that will best glorify Him. So if you don’t sing as well as some people you know, that’s ok! The voice God has given you is the voice that you will use to best bring glory to Him. He created you that way, let’s rejoice in that!”

Even still, a few years later, “So about my nose, God…why do I have to look like a bird? Would it have been so hard to make my nose just a little bit cuter?” My dissatisfaction had carried into my mid-twenties. It was something I never talked about much, but every time I looked at a picture there it was. Staring me in the face. That nose!

We all have things that we’re dissatisfied about. Whether it’s a job situation, a season of life, the way you look, or the gifts that you have been given. Maybe you simply have a hard time seeing the glass as half full. It does take more effort that way. I was the same way.

Until the past few years, I had a hard time being content with a lot of the ways God had made me. I knew the verses, “God does not look at the outward appearance, but at the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7) and “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made,” (Psalm 139:14). But for some reason, they just didn’t resonate with me. It took some serious soul searching, and I’ll admit, some tears, but I finally came to realize that my contentment and my satisfaction come from Jesus Christ and Him alone.

They come from being rooted and grounded in Him and His love for me.

Once I realized that God loves me for me, all my faults and flaws aside, I started to gain some confidence. When it finally hit home that while I was still a sinner, He died for me (Romans 5:8), things became a lot more clear. He wasn’t waiting for me to color my hair or take voice lessons or get a nose job. He loved me enough that even with all those things, He died for me. And He loves me. And He calls me daughter (Ephesians 1:5). And He delights in me (Zephaniah 3:17).

When I filled myself up with those truths, I was so full that there was no longer any room for dissatisfaction.

I’ve heard it said that gratitude turns what we have into enough. And truly, friends, there is nothing else in this world that is more “enough” than Jesus. He is the one that can turn your dissatisfaction in life into gratitude.

I’m a much more confident woman these days. The younger version of myself probably wouldn’t even recognize me. Now, my red hair is actually one of my favorite things about myself, I am perfectly fine to keep singing with the voice that God has given me, and I’ve embraced that bird nose of mine as part of my Czechoslovakian heritage. While I still have days where I find myself dissatisfied, all I need to do is remind myself to be filled with Christ; to repeat those simple truths, and find things to be grateful for. Only then will I be able to push the dissatisfaction out.

Lindsay Behr is a stay-at-home mom to three beautiful girls and wife to her high school sweetheart, Blake. You can find her trying to capture the beauty of everyday moments on her blog www.capturesinbeauty.com, she’ll probably have a cup of coffee in one hand and a baby in the other.