Emptying the nest is a gradual shift, not a sudden jerk!

Transition from instructing to inspiring

Proverbs 3:21-26 NLT
My child, don’t lose sight of common sense and discernment. Hang on to them, for they will refresh your soul. They are like jewels on a necklace. They keep you safe on your way, and your feet will not stumble. You can go to bed without fear; you will lie down and sleep soundly. You need not be afraid of sudden disaster or the destruction that comes upon the wicked, for the Lord is your security. He will keep your foot from being caught in a trap.

Transition from managing to mentoring

Philippians 4:9 NIV
Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

Proverbs 13:20 NLT
Walk with the wise and become wise; associate with fools and get in trouble.

Transition from rescuing to releasing

Proverbs 9:7-12 ESV
Whoever corrects a scoffer gets himself abuse, and he who reproves a wicked man incurs injury. Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight. For by me your days will be multiplied, and years will be added to your life. If you are wise, you are wise for yourself; if you scoff, you alone will bear it.

To all of the parents *Allison Bottke – Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Child

- S – Stop enabling, blaming yourself, and the flow of money
- A – Assemble a support group
- N – Nip excuses in the bud
- I – Implement rules and boundaries
- T – Trust your instincts above your emotions
- Y – Yield it all to God

To all of the 18-20 somethings in the room, be FREE!

- F – Financially live within your own means and pay for your own failures
- R – Relationally chose the right friends and walk away from the wrong ones
- E – Establish your own walk with Christ
- E – Escape the victim mentality and own your mistakes

Eagles learn to fly by watching their parents. They stand with their wings outstretched and feel the wind catch their wings on the edge of the nest. The feeling of the wind in their wings the eaglet gets a little more adventurous. First, they jump onto close branches while flapping their wings, and slowly try further and further branches, until the moment they discover they can actually fly on their own!

Until the young eagle discovers the power of their wings, they are just another bird. It isn’t until they learn to soar that they fully grasp the privilege of being an eagle. But, before an eagle can experience the thrill of soaring, they must overcome the fear of falling!

For us, the most thrilling thing as human beings isn’t soaring, it’s the ability to be self-reliant and independent! As parents we must teach our children the art of being self-reliant and independent, we must cheer them on and give them the encouragement they need to overcome their fear of failure. It doesn’t happen overnight, it doesn’t simply become reality when they turn 18 or 21 or 25, it is a gradual, intentional process that each and every parent must engage in so that they can empty the nest well!

This is a gradual shift. Transitioning from being a drill sergeant to a cheerleader. Becoming the mentor of their lives rather than their manager. This also comes with the humility from us as parents to realize that a great mentor alone doesn’t have all of the answers, so he brings others in to assist and give more voices to the mentoring process. Another reason why community is important. We all need help. But we need that help to come from the wise not from the fools (Proverbs 13:20 NLT). These are people who will help our children and us as we transition from rescuing our children to fully releasing them.

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